I don't currently feel like a widow, but I have been widowed in the past (before I dealt with chronic pain) and I'm recently divorced (relationship was heavily influenced by my chronic pain). I find it helpful to surround myself with family or friends (even newly-made friends) who are comfortable just hanging out on my couch and watching movies or shows, even while I work. I also try to make sure I have good lists of saved movies for myself to watch because some days I just don't have the energy to look through them all. I try to keep my days with each friend rotating so I have someone on my team every day, helping me keep up with life.

The other most helpful thing for me is having a (semi)well-behaved, medium-sized dog that loves to sit with me, go on walks around the neighborhood or at the beach, or anywhere I take her. She is my motivation when I feel like going to bed as soon as I get home, when depression is weighing me down, when I need some exercise, and she's hugely supportive when I just need someone to cuddle with.

I also try to get into crafts or hobbies that involve either mild physical activity or no physical activity, so I can do things that I want, when I have the energy or stamina for them. I'm glad most of my friends are movie lovers and sight-seers. I hope these suggestions are helpful to you @A MyChronicPainTeam Member

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A MyChron...

@kathyng76

On bad days when I have to go out I will use my crutches or cane. I have also been out shopping and the pain got so bad and was going to fall down I have used the stores or malls wheelchair. At first I was embarrassed for asking for them my mom does it for me if I am with her lol but I end up having no choice. My parent asked me if I should get one for that or one of the electric ones. My aunt has one not in use since her husband passed away 3 years ago so my mom asked me if I would want to borow it. I haven't read your story yet but have you been diagnosed? I am a baker by train so I have been making our sweets and breads for a while luckily I have tall chairs so I pull my chair up to the counter to work. Our house did not have a yard we lived in a townhouse but my new place has a little front yard with a apple tree. This spring I am going to attempt a very small garden not very good at that stuff I usually lose interest lol. I am a vegetarian so the more veggies for free the better. Last summer I did a herb container garden on my balcony I did enjoy it. Nothing beats fresh herbs. So I figured I will start small seebhow it goes and if I goes good I will go bigger. Is the cheapskates club a online thing? If so I will have to check it out every little bit helps.

@KevanVan Pelt Hi I think that it is great to have nice memories of the pleasant things in the passed I have been widowed for 28years and have a box of memories when I feel disheartened I dig it out and go through it is seems to act as an uplifting to me and makes me feel strong again hugs to you

@A MyChronicPainTeam Member

So sorry for your loss it's the worst I understand not being able to go through your husbands car I can not go through my husband clothes I have had to leave our house not my (choice) so I kept some of my favourites out and the rest are in Rubbermaid containers in my spare room. I have on of his and my favourite sweaters that I spray his cologne on and sleep. I bring it with me when my daughter and I go to stay at my parents house so I can still sleep with it. My daughter also does the same with one of his other clothing. I am happy that you have a friend who is there for you and is close that you can stay at her place. I only have one friend now and she lives in another province. She has been great as in sending me messages and when she is able to she will call to see how we are doing. I do have my parents but there is only so much I show and tell them. Listen to me go on and on sorry today is 7 months to the day that he has passed and I have been so emotional the last few days and today is a complete disaster. Have you joined a support group for losses your husband on line or in person? I have looked for one in my city but they are only at churches ( I am not religious all ) and they are so far away from where I am I no longer able to drive my car due to pain and fighting with his family for it because it was not in my name. I have been looking online the last few days but all I can find is blogs and well I would like to talk to people who are going through the same thing not just reading about what we are going through. Again I am so sorry for your loss.

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A MyChron...

I'm so very sorry for what all is going on with you. I feel the same way a lot. You will be in my.prayers. That's what keeps me going